Slut Shaming and Absolute Lads

by GEM Magazine / Oct 20, 2016 / Comments

As the due date for me to jump on a one way flight to Magaluf crept upon me, I had to endure my companion’s assumptions on what my working in Magaluf experience would be like.

I was confronted with my male co-worker referring to me as ‘maga-slaga’, despite the fact I was in a happy committed relationship. Of course, I will never forget my assistant manager predicting that I would cheat on my boyfriend after only a few nights.

These are just some of the assumptions associated with these types of destinations. It’s thought to be just sex, alcohol, sun, sex and alcohol, and then a vomit filled plane journey home.

The tearful day came when I had to jump on the plane, with no friends or family beside me and fly to the unknown.

I’d met my new roommates, I’d barely unpacked, and it was time for my first night on the legendary Magaluf strip. It was chaos, absolute chaos but I loved it. We went on a bar crawl with the company reps who help you get an apartment and as the night went on I got to know them a bit better.

They both had girlfriends and whilst one flirted with all the girls, the other bragged shamelessly about always cheating on his girlfriend of two years, even saying “I love my girlfriend but I love Maga girls more”. Of course, this was hilarious, why wouldn’t it be? A man in a committed relationship, constantly cheating on his girlfriend... "absolute lad."

Then we proceeded to hear about the girls of Magaluf, how the shot girls will do anything to make money. I heard about the girl who gave oral sex to 24 lads in one of the clubs for a free drink. Just to clarify, on later investigation it wasn’t 24 lads, and this girl was so drunk she could barely stand or keep her head up. She was promised a free holiday and was so drunk she actually did it.

Now she is judged for being a slag. She’s slut shamed every time she’s mentioned as you walk past the infamous club, but the group of boys who took advantage of a girl who didn’t even know where she was, well... they're "absolute lads."

I remember one boy I met, as we all sat having drinks, began boasting about how he has a different girl every night, how he’d even slept with a bride to be. He then proceeded to talk about how some girls in Magaluf were complete slags, they’d have sex with a few men a week and flirt with everyone who gave them attention.

These girls were slags but boys like him, well they were "absolute lads."

We were constantly warned about having our drinks spiked; but who was telling the lads NOT to spike girls drinks? Who was warning them about the punishment of spiking drinks? Who was telling them about the mental effect, having your drink spiked has on a person? No one. It was just something that happened, that’s the way it was and it wasn’t going to change.

We live in a world where it becomes the girl’s responsibility not to be drugged by another person. "Did you put your drink down?" "Was you leading him on?" "What were you wearing?" Slag.

But the boy who bought the girl home? "Absolute lad."

There’s a double standard in today’s generation and generations before that we’re all aware of, yet re-enforce every day.

Whilst I’m providing evidence of slut shaming in its purest form, you’ll come across it in school, work or on social media daily. The only way to stop this is to think before we speak.

Before you call her a slag, stop and think, would you say that about a man? She’s her own woman, isn’t she entitled to do what she wants? The same as any person.

Our bodies and minds are our own. Each one of us unique. We should be free to make our own choices and decisions, regardless of our gender.

I remained faithful, despite the stereotype, and I had an amazing month in Magaluf.

I loved it, but apparently the only people who love Magaluf are lads and slags. So what does that make me?

What do we call a woman who does what she wants, when she wants? An absolute lass.

By Sarah Hannah.

Sarah has spent the larger proportion of her life battling with crippling social anxiety. She has taken a back seat in life, observing how we treat each other and the earth. Sarah wants to confront these issues head on, as she overcomes her anxiety. Sarah is working towards going to university and has hopes of entering the publishing world to use her knowledge and writing to help others.

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