Carew Martin - Why I Don't Shun Anti-Depressants

by GEM Magazine / Aug 09, 2015 / Comments

Growing up in the 1970's I had what is now referred to as ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), but since such diagnoses didn't exist back then I was just considered a boisterous, disruptive kid.

By the time I finished school, I lacked the grades to consider university so I went into the workplace where I then lacked direction, so I simply drifted from one job to the next and was fired a few times along the way.

It was during one of these periods in my early twenties when I was living at home and collecting welfare, that things really started to fall apart for me.

I was raking leaves one day and it dawned on me how little I cared about what I was doing with my life. That feeling intensified until I simply put down the rake, walked inside and started to cry. I cried for a while until my mother suggested we go to the psychiatric hospital to see if they could help.

I ended up staying for close to a month since my feelings of lethargy and indifference to everything didn't change much due to my psychiatrist insisting that multi-vitamins were the end-all cure-all for myriad mental ills.

By the time I was released at the end of the month, little had changed so it didn't take long before I was readmitted to the hospital, although the circumstances the second time were very different.

One thing I was interested in was electronics, particularly stereo equipment, so I had gone with my friend to a stereo shop and purchased an equalizer for my stereo. This was not a good idea as I was living at home with no job so as soon as my father found out he became angry and lashed out.

At this point, I'd had enough and decided I was going to take my own life. I took the 120 anti-depressants, which my doctor had prescribed for me and went to bed.

As I was a night owl, my parents thought it was odd that I'd gone to bed early that evening so they checked on me and saw me having a seizure. They called an ambulance and the next thing I knew I was back in the hospital bed. But this time I was in psychiatric intensive care as somehow, I'd been made to take charcoal to clean out the toxic dose of anti-depressants.

I stayed for another ten days but the result was the same with the psychiatrist convinced that the proper dose of multi-vitamins would straighten me out with little effect.

Once again I was released in the same predicament, with few changes and not surprisingly I was readmitted again a little while later. After three psychiatric hospital admissions, I had little to show in the way of progress.

The most frustrating thing was my psychiatrist's stubbornness and insistence that his approach worked in spite of my experience to the contrary.

As depressions usually have lifespans I eventually crawled out of mine and back into the world of the living after that third stay but it took a long time before I had much appetite for life.

In the fall I went to college but unfortunately my doctor was right, I wasn't ready yet for the workload as I was still overcoming the depression. I didn't do too well.

A couple of years passed before I was stricken with depression again but I knew better than to return to the same psychiatrist. Instead I received a prescription for prozac from my GP and what an incredible difference it made. While my libido vanished, so did my desire to sleep my life away. Getting out of bed and being active was easy and pleasant.

In my experience, I would suggest to anyone considering a naturopathic remedy for their depression, to not shun pharmaceuticals, they have been proven to work.

And they may have saved my life.

By Carew Martin

Carew is an experienced writer who keeps himself busy looking after his two daughter's, writing, riding his scooter and finding money.

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